I’ve been evaluating my problem-solving skills and it dawned on me that I tend to use one of three methods: Solve It, Resolve It or Let It Be. But the first step in dealing with any problem is defining the problem. If you don’t have an accurate understanding of the problem, you can waste time and energy resolving an issue that is peripheral to the actual problem. For example, I often feel I am somehow “behind” because I haven’t completed (to my satisfaction) the twelve items I decided I needed to complete during the day. I could conclude I should get up earlier and stay up later until all are completed, but a more realistic solution would be to prioritize and shorten the list.
I like to think of defining the problem accurately as Owning the problem. It means you have accepted some responsibility for the issue and plan to do something about it – Solve It, Resolve It or Let It Be.
When I was a teenager, I joined by church’s youth choir. My best friend, a talented pianist with a wonderful soprano voice, belonged and talked me in to joining. I was not musically talented in any way, but this was a volunteer organization and they accepted EVERYONE. So I became a soprano. The problem was, if I was near an alto when we were singing, I sang as an alto.
The choir director noticed this tendency and had his daughter (a talented singer and an alto who could sing as a soprano) walk next to me when we walked down the aisle, singing as a soprano to keep me on track until I was safely under the influence of the other sopranos. I soon concluded I couldn’t carry a consistent tune even if I had a basket.
I married a man who was even more musically challenged than I. When our son was born we began a family tradition of serenading the birthday person with the most tone-deaf version of Happy Birthday we could manage. We had both realized our lack of musical talent. We owned the problem and turned it into a dubious plus.
I must admit, I still often “sing”- usually in the car when I am driving and there are no passengers. I play the radio and have become quite adept at singing some of the choruses. Of course, on those rare occasions when I’m feeling particularly confident of my musical ability and turn off the radio to sing acapella, I am reminded of my complete lack of progress.
